Today, I shall let you have a glimpse of my past daily routines. They were not exactly unhealthy, but I would not call it fantastic either. On most days, it would look something like this:
- I start off reading a chapter/ or an article on my way to work
- Work my butt off from 8.30 am to 6 pm
- Attempt to read some more on my way back home; succeed sometimes but fail most times because I am dead tired and would doze off.
- Have my dinner at mum’s
- Back home and feeling shagged
As you can see, I am mostly dog-tired by the time I get home. The nature of my job is demanding, and it saps every ounce of energy in me. So after coming home from mum’s, I will shower and get to bed, and just when I thought I could fall right into lalaland, I start feeling awake. Of course, my natural response to my tossing and turning was to reach out for my handphone and browse social media. Not exactly the kind of lifestyle I want to lead, yeah?
I did not like how I was leading my life, and it felt like I was wasting my time away. Then, my friend C recommended the book ATOMIC HABITS to me. I read its synopsis and decided to purchase the book. It was THE book that turned my life around, literally.
What struck me was what the author said in his book:
“True behaviour change is an identity change. You might start a habit because of motivation, but the only reason you’ll stick with it is if it becomes a part of your identity” – James Clear
He goes on to say, and I quote, “Habits are how you embody your identity.” He gave an example of how we embody our identity as an organised person when we make our bed each day. This also means that the more I repeat a behaviour, the more I reinforce the identity I want to be associated with that behaviour.
And I want not only to be identified as a dedicated blogger and a great Ukelele player but someone who remains committed and finishes off what I start. I do not want to be labelled as someone who is capricious or fickle. The author recommended quite a fair bit of strategies to help people like us establish good habits. I was overwhelmed by the contents inside the book and what I needed to do to get going.
So I decided to go easy on myself and chose two strategies to start with.
The first one is what James Clear calls ‘Habit Stacking’. The key here is attaching the desired behaviour (write my blog) to a current habit (take my night supplements). So the formula is like this, “After I (current behaviour), I will (desired behaviour)”, and this is how it will look like on mine, “After I take my night supplements, I will write my blog.” In his book, James Clear shared that while deciding on a current habit, we should choose one that happens daily because habit formation becomes easier and automatic with repetitions.
To help me with the ‘Habit Stacking’. I included a ‘cue’ (I turn on the balcony lights where I do my writing and place my laptop there) so that it prompts me to go to the balcony, open my laptop and start blogging.
The second strategy that I have adopted from the ATOMIC HABITS is ‘Two-Minute Rule. I have always thought that when I start on a topic for my blog, I have to complete it on the same day, and if I do not, then I should not even start. However, James Clear talks about how it does not have to be that way. He said, and I quote, “When you start a new habit, it should take less than two minutes to do.” and “that nearly any habit can be scaled down into a two-minute version.” So, with that in mind, I crafted my two-minute version, so instead of ‘complete my blog in one sitting’, it became, ‘write a sentence on my blog topic’. The whole idea was to make my habit as easy as possible and carry it out without feeling insurmountable. Once you master the art of ritualising that ‘two-minute habit, you can slowly increase the demands and scale them towards your goal, and trust me, you will no longer feel that the habit is a chore, and it gets easier with time.
With the cues in place and an achievable behaviour, I find it easier to commit to what I have started and be that dedicated blogger and great Uke player whom friends and family identify me to be.
So give these simple strategies a shot, and dispel sayings like, ‘Old Habits Die hard’, Research has shown that once neural pathways have been formed, it is difficult to alter them and kick that old habit of yours. As much truth as there is to it, I believe that persistence will pay off.
A 2009 study by the European Journal of Social Psychology showed that, on average, it takes about 66 days to establish a new habit; I took less than that and now, I feel uncomfortable when I cannot blog.
I guess I am already off to a good start!